Skip to main content

What Do you See When you Look in the Mirror?

This morning I looked in the rearview mirror as I was driving to work, and for a moment, I saw the timid little girl I used to be, with ears that she hadn't grown into yet and droopy bedroom eyes. 

I saw myself through the eyes of that little girl, always feeling like somehow there was something wrong with me or that I wasn't like everyone else. It was a story I told myself for a long time, that with my crooked teeth and shyness, I must not have been meant to be "normal," and would just have to keep pretending to act like everyone else. 

I remember staring at myself when I was a child, wishing I had eyes like Jasmine from Disney's Aladdin movie, and trying to figure out how to wear my hair to hide my ears. Thinking, if those things could just be different, if my teeth could be straighter, if the popular boy in class could just like me, then I would have everything figured out. 

I can still see my old childhood self studying how other people acted, interacted, and related to others to try and figure out how they seemed to have "made it." 

The whole time I was a child experiencing these thoughts, I was missing the message that the only thing holding me back was myself. I got braces in middle school, and once my teeth were straight I felt less of a need to prove myself to others. I gained confidence and felt that I could hold my head higher. But nothing about me as a human had changed at all. Our outer appearance does not define who we are. Straight teeth don't make us a better person. It was only my mindset that had really changed and allowed me to open up.

These stories we tell ourselves can hold us back as long as we let them. Even once we know they are not true, they may still pop up from time to time when we least expect it. I'm sharing this to show that just because old thoughts and negative thought patterns may pop up from time to time, it doesn't mean we have to believe them. It doesn't mean they have to continue being a part of who we are. 

So, what is one to do when you look in the mirror and see your old self? 

1. Don't try to avoid the thoughts. Accept that the thoughts are there, and that not every thought has to be considered truth. 

2. Look at your face in the now. It is not the same face as your old self. Years, time, and knowledge have built it into the "you" that you are now.

3. Love your old self, no matter how hard that may seem, as your old self has helped shape you into the beautiful person you are now, no matter how negative the past may have been. 

-The Wonder Vegan

Comments

  1. This post was a necessity for me because i tried doing morning workout so many times but i always get so lazy in the morning and then at the end i always regret.I am definitely going to follow your tips.Hopefully,after using your tips i am going to workout every morning!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

5 Ways to Get to Your Early Morning Workout

Sometimes, the hardest part of getting your workout in is just getting started or getting to the gym! Here are 5 tips that may make it easier to get going. 
1. Sleep in Your Gym Clothes. When we're tired, the more steps it takes to do something, the less we may want to do it. If you wake up already dressed for the gym, that's one less thing you have to do before heading out the door. 
2. Set your Coffee Pot On a Timer. When it comes to early mornings, it's not that we hate the morning itself, it's the being tired that we despise! If you drink coffee, have your coffee pot timed to start a few minutes before you wake up. If you  have another favorite caffeinated drink, prep it the night before or set a cup/bottle of it next to your bed. 
3.  Make an Appointment to Meet Someone There. This should be someone you wouldn't want to disappoint (best friend, trainer, etc). Even if we aren't in the mood to show up for ourselves, we can be much more likely to show up if it ma…

Self- Fulfilling Prophecies

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: positive or negative expectations about a situation, event, or person, in which your expectations may affect you or someone else's behavior in a way that causes the expectations to occur.

Example: expecting a person to be unkind based on how they look, you may (consciously or unconsciously) treat them in a way that causes them to act unkind.
Example: a person begins college, all the while telling themselves they aren't "smart enough/ good enough/ meant to" finish college. They may be more likely to drop out of college than those who believe in themselves.  
Sometimes the things we tell ourselves can be so powerful that we really think they're a non negotiable truth. Our thoughts are so powerful that way. We believe there's no way around things so we don't even try.... We believe we aren't capable of
something so we don't even try to  challenge it, or we challenge it / try, all the while telling ourselves we can't, and th…

motherhood & grief • a mirror

The space in which you exist that is your life- after-giving-birth, I've learned, is really a lot like living in grief. But no one tells you that. Maybe most don't even see it. Or maybe it just sounds ungrateful or sad, or too confusing to say out loud. I don't mean that it is like grief in the way that we feel, but rather it mirrors grief in the way other people treat us, as mothers to infants. 
Have you ever experienced a great loss, and notice that people give you a sort of "deadline" to get back to your old self? Maybe they apologize for your loss, come around a bunch at first, check in on you and show you support. Even judge you, perhaps, if you don't seem sad enough. You're supposed to be sad, and you are. And the social norm of expectation is right where's its supposed to be (insert: sarcasm). 
But after a short time, they expect you to move on, to be the same person you always were, and maybe not talk about the loss anymore or express emotion abo…